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The friends I've met on NoLongerLonely. Your chat room is the coolest! Boy were they expensive and when I did get a date didn't happen a lot things got complicated when it came to disclosing my illness. It always stressed me out and usually the other person would be scared away.


A mental illness. And online dating? They are not able to see you or your personality. And I am not my illness.

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It is a part of me, but there is a whole lot more to me as a person. So, how and when do you talk about your mental illness: before the first date or after your second? Perhaps you even wait for a third? Well, it depends.

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I know my approach is not for everyone. It can be scary and intimidating to a lot of people. But as someone that is very open and honest about my illness, I feel it is imperative to bring it up right away. I am dead in the water most of the time.

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So, how do you bring up your mental illness? When do you bring up your mental illness? On day one. That said, some would argue you need to get to know the person first, and they need to get to know you, and I agree with part of that - at least to an extent. You do need to know the person first but hiding your illness can make things worse in the long run. The conversation changes, and that is because the very mention of bipolar brings up a whole host of stigmas.

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My lows normally mean isolation, so having someone normally helps that. And my highs mean I want to go out and can be hyper sexual with a lot of PDA. But violent? I try to be open about the diagnosis and what that means for my behavior. When I meet new friends it is important for them to ask before any contact is made beyond a handshake. My ptsd often causes me to shut down without consensual contact. My biggest contact trigger tends to be a gentle touch to my left shoulder and often new friends want to touch, hug or make contact which can be terrifying for me.

I find most women tend to be understanding while men are mixed with those having an issue being receptive and those without a challenge moving on. I am very similar and this was very refreshing to read.

No one should have to make the same adaptations that they make for work to socially adapt when starting an intimate partnership. That just exasperates symptoms associated with mental illness. Even though there have been quite a few people who were eager to date me regardless who didn't know much about mental illness, I found it difficult to want to be with them.

But me? I tend to bring it up in the first conversation.

I am an advocate; in fact, my dating profiles mention I am an advocate. But still it can be a tough subject to bring up.

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What part of the conversation you have gives an opening to bring this sort of thing up? Make no mistake: some individuals are more understanding than others. Am I going to hurt someone - especially them? The answer is no.

More often you are going to deal with isolation on lows and sometimes highs. So, when do you bring up your mental illness?

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How do you bring up your mental illness? That is the question.

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That is my dilemma. I try to be open about the I try to be open about the diagnosis and what that means for my behavior. I am very similar and this I am very similar and this was very refreshing to read. Your name. The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly. About text formats.

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